It is Well-By Andrew

I was born in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma; to two extremely poor parents, just trying to make it through Bible College.

At the age of four, my parents graduated and moved us to Albuquerque, New Mexico. They worked on staff there for 6 years, and in second grade, in my dad's Sunday school class, my best friend made a profession of faith. I saw my best friend accepting Christ, and so I of course wanted that too. It was fake. Didn't mean anything. just wanted to be popular, fit it. It's a dangerous game to play when your approach to Christianity is based on being popular or fitting in.

In 2015, we moved to Phoenix, Arizona.

For a year and a half my dad worked at an electrical company, and our family helped at a church plant. If you don't know what a church plant is, it's a couple families that are sent to an area to start a brand-new church. While we helped, my overall conclusion was this: I never want to be a pastor's son, and I especially don't want my dad to start a church.

I started doubting my salvation at age twelve, wrestling with it pretty hard, pushing off the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I kept going back to the 'experience' I had in my dad's Sunday school class. Weeks turned into months, and months turned into night after night after sleepless night. I finally broke down, and shared my struggle with my parents. My dad actually took many of those sleepless nights, showing me Bible verses and praying with me. Then finally, on a Sunday morning, the pastor got up and stopped the series he was in to preach a sermon on 'Do you know, that you know that you're saved?' It hit me like a ton of bricks, but I still resisted.

One night, I couldn't take it anymore, and I finally went to my dad, and told him that I couldn't trust in the empty, meaningless prayer I had made years earlier, and I needed to be saved. So he took me into his bedroom, offering to show me verses about salvation. But being raised in church, I told him, "I don't need that. I know what I need to do. I just need to do it." It was a Saturday night, July 15th, 2017; that I was saved. I still had my struggles with sin, but the burden that had so long been on me was gloriously lifted. My sins, that I had done were lifted off my shoulders as I allowed Jesus to bear the full weight of them and give me an eternal future with him, sparing me from eternal hellfire.

Life was good. My eternity was secured, our family had moved to a new church, I was finally making friends my age. And then, a year later, my dad was called to church plant in 2018.

Our family went all around the country, raising money for the church. It was great. People were excited, my family bonded like never before, but the expectations I had then didn't match reality when our family started Hope Baptist Church in 2019. It was hard. I had no friends. God seemed to be absent, not doing anything there. That's when I began to run.

I knew God had some kind of calling on my life at that point, and I decided I wanted nothing to do with it. For the entire 3 1/2 years we were there, I ran, and I ran hard. I basically told God I'd go along to get along with my family, but the moment I turned 18, I was gone.

In July of 2021, I was done. God had sent our family away from my friends, my dad was working 80 hours a week, 40 managing that electrical company he had been with our whole time in Phoenix and 40 working at the church, and I had nothing to live for.

I wanted to end it all when I screamed to God. "Where are you? Why have you left me alone?"

And he floored me. While I don't believe God speaks to us verbally, I felt his Spirit lay these words upon my heart.

You aren't alone. I've always been here.

You're the one running, not me.

The next week, I went to a conference in Oklahoma City, at the college my parents once attended; and it began a process. I began working on a new plan for my life. I remember one of the speaker saying these words "God doesn't use us in spite of our weaknesses, he uses us precisely because we are weak." It was exactly what I needed. It began my journey, a journey leading to total reliance on God's strength.

The last evening of the conference, the song director led us in the hymn ‘It Is Well’. As nearly 2,000 people sang their hearts out to God, I came close to tears as I realized for the first time in two years, I could truly say, it is well. In that moment I knew that God’s will for my life was to go to that college and I surrendered. Although I didn’t know what he had for me, I committed myself to it.

After two weeks though, my decisions were gone and I went back to the, I'm gone at 18; plan.

Not like gone from church or anything, gone from my parents, gone from my family, I was just gonna check out, go get my masters, and begin working towards becoming president of the United States. I could have made it. I have no doubt in my mind that with the proper training and focus, I could ascend the political ladder, and make a name and legacy for myself.

That was the path I walked. The purpose I had in mind.

God continued to convict me of his true purpose, his true calling on my life, but I wasn't having it. I had my plan and I was sticking to it. I didn't even truly know what his plan was, I just didn't want it.

In November of last year, God moved our family again. This time, to Iowa. And when the church there called him to be their pastor, I knew immediately that was my calling. But I ignored it.

And then May happened. God basically spoke to me so strongly saying, "last chance. I'll let you do your own thing, but this opportunity is about to be over, about to be ended. If you refuse, then go figure it out. And don't expect me to help you with your problems."

That crushed me. At church on Sunday, I couldn't hear anything my pastor, my dad; said.

I knew I had to choose. And so, I chose surrender. Chose God's path for my life and scrapped my own.

Then about a month ago, I surrendered all my sin. I realized that being surrendered to God's will is useless if you aren't surrendered to his Word.

In a week and a half, my journey towards God's calling begins. I'm going to a Bible College in Oklahoma City, the same on my parents went through, for a degree in Pastoral Theology. To begin to prepare my life for ministry, to be a pastor.

I've come full circle. Back to the beginning of my life in Oklahoma City, at a small Bible college. A student just trying to do God's will. And I can't wait for the adventure that is ahead. In my past, I struggled and doubted that where God had me was where he wanted me. Where I stand today, looking back and looking to the future, I can finally say this: it is well.

If you’ve never experienced the life changing grace that comes from trusting in Jesus as your personal Savior, trusting that his death on the cross was enough to pay for our sins, and his resurrection from the grave was enough to save us from death and hell, but you would like to know more, feel free to reach out to us here at Brave the Battle, or reach out to me personally at andrewillsley13@gmail.com

You can listen to the sermon that had a profound impact on my life by going here: Wednesday Evening Message | Tyler Prater by Southwest Baptist Church (soundcloud.com)

My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought

My sin, not in part; but the whole

Is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, o, my soul

It Is Well, Classic Hymn

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